Harnessing the Wild Within

So many of my personal barriers have fallen during my journey with MONEY - which have brought high frustrations, expanding opportunities, exhilaration, depression, and setbacks all into an incredible alchemical stew. I have tried to anticipate the manifestations of asking, receiving, and being consumed and nothing has turned out like I imagined.

I decided to clear my mind and trust my own magick. I waited as the spirit of MONEY appeared to me as a horse - a massive, beautiful, and powerful horse. I was close enough to look into her eye, connect with her intensity, and sense the embodiment of her massive power. I stroked her mane, felt the veins of her neck, smelled the sweat on her fur, and connected with the wildness in her soul. I let myself become the horse - to merge completely.

I realized I had seen this image before in the Chariot Tarot card. I could see myself trying to manage opposing, contradictory, and paradoxical horses - desires all pulling me in different directions. I could see how the Charioteer could not harness their collective power, or move forward until she aligned their commonality. The message was clear - find the liminal in-between spaces where my life connects and overlaps... Lean into this and experience all of it - don't worry about the outcome, just embrace the core spirit of the horses.

Long story short - I followed this up with some meditation and writing... then condensing and overlapping. found part of my problem is the privilege of too many choices. I have gained a lot of skill and achievement in several areas and I can't do them all. After some sketching, scribbling, and playing around with contours, implied lines, and overlapping themes, I saw that the horses of my Chariot revolved around the intersection of four themes: Money, Energy, Time, and Art.

When I imagined when have I been in a flow state of ecstacy - I could prioritise the possibilities. For me they came out as : Writing, Tarot, Teaching, and Textile Art. I could see how the Tarot became the metaphorical container for all four. My memoir (A Wytch in the Land of Mormon Oz) could be organized through the lens of Tarot - especially since that paradox fits so well with it own inconsistency. My readings with others could be deepened by further creative excavations (from personal dream imagery as tarot to custom tarot portraitures for clients). I could see how the archetypes of tarot form a container for the human journey of my teaching. And finally textile arts are not only an immensely immanent and grounding art, but a way to express intimacy in imaginative exploration of the deep symbolism within Tarot.

For me my own witch 'crafting' is about leaning into the messiness...feeling all of it...getting very intimate with its energy...using the tools we have been given... trusting the process....letting it be organic and intuitive...and anticipating the amazing life art that will emerge in all its potential ugliness, grace, and power.